Showing posts with label dear mom of an adhd child. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dear mom of an adhd child. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 25, 2014

Dear mom of an ADHD child



Dear mom of an ADHD child,

I know you are tired. You are worn out. Your house is always in chaos and never clean. There is yelling and fighting between siblings. There have been toys thrown and tears cried. Toothpaste has been spread all over the mirror and homework is a constant battle.

You have called your husband crying. Not knowing if you can take anymore. You've wondered if she would have been better off being an only child, thinking if only she were I could give her the attention she wants. You have yelled more than you like to admit. And you've said things you wish you could take back.

You've made hard choices. Change the families diet? Therapy? Medicine? Maybe you've made all of those choices at different times. Whatever choice you make you are never sure if it's the right one.

To the mom who doesn't give medicine. I know everyday is a struggle. Sometimes you can't wait for bedtime. You are exhausted and tired of yelling. You are doing the best you can when sometimes you don't feel like you are. You change your child's diet and take your child to therapy. You just wish something would "click." You deal with people telling you, "just give your child a pill." You are tired of explaining your choice.

To the mom who does mediciate. I know everyday is a struggle. Sometimes you can't wait for bedtime. Your child has good days but sometimes they have bad ones. You are exhausted and tired of yelling. You are doing the best you can when sometimes you don't feel like you are.You deal with people telling you that you are drugging your child. They question how you could do such a thing. They question the type of doctor you bring your child to being sure that doctors "these days just hand out pills." You've done your research. You tried everything else before this. You've been to multiple doctors. But what they don't understand is this. They didn't see the difference the moment your child took the right medicine for them. They didn't see your child being able to focus and listen to everything that is said to them. They didn't see the notes sent home from teachers who said they noticed the huge difference and that things are just clicking for them now. They didn't see how happy that made your heart and what a huge difference it has done for your child more than anything.

I've been both moms. The one who doesn't medicate and the one who does. Neither of them are easy choices. You both question if you're doing the right thing every single day. And whatever choice you make you make it every day. But only you know what's best for your child. And only you can decide. Not your family. Or friends. And that's something you need to let go. You need to stop letting it bother you. I know it's hard but please do it. Because we all know you are doing what you think is best for your child. And that's all that matters.

I wrote this letter for me. But I wrote it for you too. And I hope you re-read it when you need to.

Love,
A mom of an ADHD child


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