Thursday, March 13, 2014

letters to my daughters | kayla

To be nobody but yourself
in a world which is doing its best night and day,
to make you everybody else 
means to fight the hardest battle 
which any human being can fight;
and never stop fighting.

-ee cummings

my first baby,

the other day was a sad day for me. it was wacky wednesday. i picked out some clothes for you to wear. they were mis-matched and colorful. but you turned them down. you didn't want to dress wacky. and when i asked you why you told me, "because not everyone will be wacky." i then proceeded to tell you to go get dressed in whatever you wanted. but i wish i would've told you this....

what makes this world beautiful is it's differences. it's imperfections. those are the things that also make us beautiful. yes, you. you my dear are beautiful. our quirks, our personalities, our flaws. it's what makes the world go round. beauty is in our honesty, in our laughter, in our openness and our mistakes. and beauty is in our hearts. imperfections and all. not in what we wear. or what length your hair is.

as your mother i have always known your heart. you may appear wild and crazy, carefree, sure of yourself and there have been times in your life when you were those things. but i've watched you change. i've watched you grow. you are still a little wild but only while at home where you are comfortable and sure of our love for you. you care what others think of you. and i wish that you didn't. i wish you could see yourself the way the world sees you. the way i see you. 

beautiful.
smart.
funny.
sweet.
and
kind.


i hope that as you discover yourself that you don't let others thoughts of what is beautiful define yours. i hope you learn to embrace your quirks and flaws. your imperfections. and the imperfections of others. i hope your heart stays kind and it remains open. for you always look to see the good in others. your heart is like the sun and it shines when you enter a room. i see your heart in your carefully colored pictures for your teacher. i hear it in your voice when you talk to your sisters. and i feel it in your touch when you give me a hug.  you are as beautiful in as you are out. and i hope you know that.


don't let this sometimes cold world change your heart. for it is more beautiful than i could have ever dreamed.

love you always,
mommy


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