Monday, September 2, 2013

a happy place

It's the last day of summer vacation and I made it. There were days that I didn't think I would but I did. Having a child with adhd is hard at times. I'm not an expert at all as I am only two years in. But I have learned a lot, especially this summer.

When I started this journey two years ago I felt we would never be where we are now. A few wrong medicines here. A few doctors who just didn't care or had too many patients on their hands. A year of us "dealing" with it on our own. A year of yelling and fighting and pulling my hair out wondering what I was doing wrong. Wondering why she just didn't get it. But that's the crazy thing...she just couldn't get it because in her words her brain wouldn't let her. And after we had a heart to heart talk about her behavior she said these words to me, "Mommy. I just want my good brain back." That was the moment I knew we couldn't do this alone anymore. I had to face the facts. We needed help and that didn't make me a failure as a mother.

So fast forward a few months of behavioral therapy with the right therapist and a few doctor appointments later we are here. In a happy place. She can think clearly. She can listen fully to what is said to her. She can think about consequences. She isn't impulsive anymore. But yet she is still her. She is still the sweet, happy girl I know. The one who loves her sisters and doesn't want to fight with them. The one who loves art and playing outside. The girl who loves dressing up and wearing accessories. We aren't spending our days arguing, yelling or sending her to her room a million times anymore. We have become close again. 

There have been plenty of bumps along the way and we still have plenty of bumps and curves and possibly even a few u-turns down our road I'm sure. But for now I am happy. My girl is happy. And that's all I could ever really ask for.


  1. OMG, I just type out a LONG comment and then somehow the page refreshed itself. ARGH! Anyway, I'll try to say everything I said before.

    I think you're a great mom for many reasons, but especially for getting Kayla the help she needs. It takes a strong woman to decide to seek help instead of making excuses for the child's behavior. Kayla reminds me so much of my niece Sienna. I think Sienna has ADHD, because she will not listen or follow directions 90% of the time, and she really is a sweet girl. She can't even tell a story without getting distracted in the middle of a word. I think my sister would feel like a bad mom (which is totally not the case, the complete opposite!) if she put her young daughter on medication because society generally doesn't approve. Anyway, I think you should write more on this topic, and let other parent's know they are HELPING not hurting their children.

    1. Thank you Sean :)

      And I totally get the whole "feeling like a bad mom because you give your child medicine." I felt the same way but after trying it and seeing her on medicine...I now realize the only thing bad about the medicine was not giving it to her. When you find the right doctors and right medicine it does what it should. It helps them think clearly and let's them be who they really, truly are but are unable to be. And they won't be a zombie.



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